LUNATICS ANONYMOUS: A VISION FOR YOU.
A future member of Lunatics Anonymous stared glassily at the 2 strangers beside his bed. "Who are you fellows, and why this private room? I was always in an insane ward before." They grinned, which he didn't like so much as he thought they were lunatics. Said one of the visitors, "We're giving you a treatment for lunacy." Hopelessness was written large on the man's face as he replied, "Oh, but that's no use. Nothing would fix me. I'm a goner. The last three times, I went insane on the way home from here. I'm afraid to go out the door. I can't understand it." Asked one of the visitors, "Can you move your right hand?" With a puzzled look on his face, the man tried it, and discovered that he could. Asked one of the visitors, as he offered a glass to the man, "Can you pick this up with your right hand, and put it to your mouth?" The man tried it. "Why, yes, I can," said the man. One of the visitors filled the glass with whiskey, and handed it to the man, and asked, "Can you use your right hand to lift this glass to your mouth, and drink all of this?" The man discovered that he could. One of the visitors filled the glass with whiskey again, and handed it to the man, and asked, "Can you use your left hand to lift this glass to your mouth, and drink all of this?" The man discovered that he could do that, too. Said one of the visitors, "That explains it. That is what is happening to you on the way home from here. At least one of your hands is lifting glasses of whiskey to your mouth, and you are drinking the whiskey. That is why you are getting drunk." Said the man, "This is amazing. No one has ever been able to explain it to me so clearly before. I want to join your religious cult right now." The visitors thought they noticed something different about him already. He had begun to have a spiritual experience. They wanted to record this miracle for the world of lunatics to see. Both visitors went home, put on their best suits and returned to the lunatic’s bedside with a big box camera and a powder flash bar to record this miracle of recovery from lunacy. The two visitors gave the man in the bed a few more shots of whiskey and a large dose of belladonna. The photographer set up his camera, the two visitors smiled as they had finally found a true lunatic that would finally take the bait after culling several hundred other lunatics. The not so candid photo was taken and lunacy anonymous started.
ANONYMOUS
